{Author's Note: After posting my previous piece (A Reason for Separation?) it seemed important to me to share my thoughts regarding the worth and value of people along the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and what ministry with persons along this spectrum might look like in traditionalist settings. This was published in the South Carolina Advocate early in 2019.}
As we approach the called General
Conference in February 2019, I find myself reflecting on the differences
between traditionalists like myself and the progressives who wish to alter our
current standards. I freely admit right
up front that I am in the words of Tom Berlin et al a traditional
non-compatibilist. I stand on our
Discipline the way it is currently written.
The standards regarding sexuality were the same when I was certified,
licensed, commissioned and finally ordained.
At each point along the way I agreed to uphold those standards, and I
freely admit now that those are the standards I will continue to live by
regardless of what happens at the 2019 General Conference. But according to many of my progressive
friends there is no problem here. Under
the One Church Plan I can continue to live by those standards, and they can
choose to live by a separate set of standards.
So it seemed wise to me to try and articulate for my progressive friends
some of the differences we have as I see it, and perhaps to help them see why I
can’t agree to live by a separate set of standards regarding human sexuality
and still say we exist under the same umbrella of authority.
Let
me begin by saying I think many progressives are right in thinking a lot of
traditionalists just don’t want anything to do with the LGBTQ+ community. I have always thought this. I fear many traditionalists write off the
possibility of transformation in the life of homosexuals to the same degree the
progressives do. And in this I will
admit the progressives have us beat.
They do care about the homosexual.
I wonder if they are really helping this community, but I do think they
care. And for that they must all be
commended.
But
I also think there are still a lot of traditionalists who believe there is a
better way to engage this community than simply saying, “It is okay. You were made this way.” We believe God has a better way. We believe God’s call regarding sexuality is
straightforward and clear in Scripture.
We believe people struggle with all manner of issues regarding sexuality
and identity and the issues faced by the LGBTQ+ community are not to be treated
as some kind of especially heinous or gross sin. We believe homosexuals, and those dealing
with questions of gender identity, need a loving supportive community of faith
where they can be loved and belong and not inappropriately judged. We believe their questions and struggles will
not automatically or instantaneously go away by submitting to Scripture’s prescribed
means of sexual expression. We believe
they will fall into temptation and will need the community of believers to help
them trust in God’s forgiveness and move forward with a new resolution,
strength and will to live victoriously in Christ. We believe having faith in Jesus brings
justification; that they are fully accepted and justified before God by simply
believing in Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Savior. We believe they will spend a lifetime being
sanctified and growing in their understanding of grace. We believe these are people who have
something valuable to share and teach us about the grace of God. We believe that the grace of Jesus Christ,
found in the loving community of the church ought to bring about transformation
in the life of the person who currently identifies as LGBTQ+, in the same way
we believe it for every person who turns to Christ for salvation. These are some of the things we believe. But perhaps it might also be helpful to share
some things we traditionalists don’t believe about life as a LGBTQ+ person.
We
don’t believe LGBTQ+ persons are just willingly living sinful lives. In other words we do believe orientation, as
a way to describe what one feels inside, is a real thing. But we don’t believe orientation is the
defining factor in anyone’s life. We
don’t believe this struggle is solved by simply “committing to a life-long
monogamous relationship.” I know some
will think me crass for bringing it up, but I think progressives need to
understand this. To many traditionalists
the idea of a committed monogamous relationship for the LGBTQ+ person sounds
like arguing for polygamy for those who have committed adultery and will not be
faithful to their spouse. To us it
really just sounds like using the grace of God as a license to do what you want
as long as you can rationalize it in a way that seems acceptable in your own
eyes. We don’t believe the LGBTQ+
community ought to be kicked out of the church.
And we don’t believe that being born that way means that it is God’s
best for anyone.
Because
we do see issues surrounding the LGBTQ+ community in this way, we do find it
hard to understand why we would be encouraged to ignore our conscience regarding
the practices of those who will lead our churches and ministries, and hence we
wonder if the United Methodist Church cares about our concerns anymore. We wonder if you want us around to talk about
these things, or if you just want us to give up the ghost so to speak and
accept and believe what you’ve come to believe.
We wonder if after all the years we’ve spent listening and debating
these things and seeing the value of your care and concern if you can even
begin to see the value in our concerns?
What we hear you telling us is that God doesn’t have a better way, and
we just can’t accept or tolerate that.